Visiting The Allergist aka How I Like To Waste My Wednesday Night

A few weeks ago I was trying to come up with ways I could rush out of work early leaving a few co-workers annoyed to sit in an office somewhere for 3+ hours and listen to things I already know about myself.

Okay, that's not exactly how this all came about, but that's how it felt last night.  Heads up, this post is just littered with complaints; you've been warned.

Ever since I can remember I've been popping my collar I've had allergic reactions to medicines, metals, lotions, fragrances, animals, seasonal allergies, etc.  You name it, I sneeze it.  But for the past year, I've had reactions out the wazoo that don't tend to go away too quickly so my doctor recommended I see an allergist. It took 5 weeks to be able to get in and 5 years* to fill out all the paperwork.
*Slight exaggeration.

If you've ever visited the allergist, you know you have to provide your entire medical history and then some.  They want to know what kind of house you live in (Summerhouse was an option and I was tempted to pick that), how often you keep your windows open, and what type of flooring you have in your house - nosy much??

So I get to the allergist (thanks Molly for coming with me!) and first I see the doctor's assistant.  She gets some more info from me which was basically everything I filled out, but, hey, let's talk through it!  Then I sit and wait to see the doctor.  He was very nice and did a quick examination before telling me we would do the prick test.

Back into the hallway we went to wait for the doctor's assistant.  She took me into her office where we started with a breathing test.  I've done these before since I have asthma, so I'm familiar with how they work.  You take a big breath and blow as hard as you can into this contraption that measures your lung capacity.  Nothing like getting lightheaded nice and quick.

The prick test though... ahmagad.  They numbered my arms with 41 dots and then used this little needles that felt like bites.  And let me tell you, they hurt!  Molly definitely had to distract me a bit because this part sucked and my arms starting getting really itchy.

Annnnnd back into the hallway to wait 15 minutes while the allergy dots develop and itch even more.
I can tell right away that only three things are welting up.  When the assistant calls us back in, she looks at my arm and the numbers and tells me that I'm reacting to cats, dogs and birch trees.  I'm pretty sure my reaction looked a little like this:

If they had read the novel of paperwork I filled out and/or listened to the verbal list of allergies - I already know that I'm allergic to cats and dogs.  I've had a blood test.  This is not news to me.  And the fact that I waited so long (oh, I should mention, we're 2 hours in so far) to find out what I already knew was juuuust lovely.

So back into the the hallway we go (again) to wait (again) to talk to the doctor (again).  He "diagnoses" me with asthma and tells me how I can help lessen the effects of cat allergies, what soaps I should use (already using), what lotion I should switch to (already using), and what allergy medicine I should take (already taking).  I was so frustrated at this point hearing things that I already know.  Over ittttt.

At the end of my three hour waste of time field trip to the allergist, they said they'd like me to come back for some more extensive testing.  I made the appointment but it's getting canceled.  Not really looking to waste even more time (and money... not looking forward to that bill) to find nothing new out.

If you read this entire bitch-fest I'm impressed.  Excuse me while I go refill my tissue holder.